Friday, August 2, 2013

Conversations With a Four-Year-Old

On chess--
"Mom, can we play chess now?"
"In a minute.  I'm talking to your aunt."
"I want to move my knight right here..."
"Adults are talking, Charlie."
"...and DESTROY YOU."

On age--
"Mom, are you the end of counting?"
"What?"
"Isn't that how old you are?  The end of counting?"

In the bath tub with his brother--
"Mom!  Andrew touched my penis!"
"No penis touching!  You can only touch your own privates.  Privately, please."
"Oh I AM!"
"They're called 'private parts' for a reason.'"
"Why are you laughing, Mom?"
"I'm not.  Laughing.  It's not funny.  Stop."

At the dinner table-- 
Charlie-- "Mom, watch this!  I'm gonna disappear!"  *ducks below table*
Me-- "Oh no!  Where did Charlie go!?"
Andrew -- *pointing*  "Right here?"

In the pool during vacation--
A little girl in a condo above the pool had been coming out and talking to Charlie from her balcony when he was in the pool.  One morning, she came out onto the balcony completely naked, looking for a swimming suit or something.  Charlie looks up, does a double take, and yells, "Hey!  What's your name again??"

More questions about aging--
"Mom when I'm 11 how old will you be?"
"Ummm...41."
"When I'm 41 how old will you be?"
"71."
"When I'm 71 how old will you be?"
"I don't want to play this game anymore."

"You'll still be my mom forever, right?"
"Yes, I'll be your mom forever."

 

1 comment:

Your comments are valued almost as much as naptime. Thank you.