Click to watch the segment.
My only beef is this: I don't think mothers are taking antidepressants "to cope with raising children." Mothers are taking antidepressants/anxiety meds because they suffer from depression and anxiety. Perhaps the stresses of motherhood can exacerbate those conditions, but-- postpartum depression aside-- they are not usually a direct result of becoming a mother.
I first took an antidepressant when I was 17, and probably needed it a few years earlier than that. My first child was born when I was 29. Clearly, I am prone to depression and anxiety for biological reasons that are beyond my control. Whatever biological oddity I was born with was probably kicked into high gear by, well, life stuff. Who knows? And what's the difference? There is a medication that makes me feel better, and I take it. I also take an anti-inflammatory for my neck (perhaps you read that my spine attempted to murder me last fall), but I don't see people lining up to question me about my use of that drug.
Haters gonna hate, though. (Seriously. Look at some of the stupid comments under the video.) I don't advocate taking meds you don't need, nor do I think it's a good idea to take any drug if you don't have a prescription from a competent doctor who is monitoring your progress. Drugs like Xanax, Klonopin, and Ativan are highly addictive, and they will make you a worse mother if you develop a serious problem with them. My pharmacist husband reminded me of that on a
Because it totally is.
Amen. It was pretty good and you did great. I was a little insulted by the vibe I was getting that because a mom is on medication for mental health issues she is trying to avoiding the normal stresses of motherhood.
ReplyDeleteIt bothered me too that they were trying to say moms were turning to anti-depressants because they couldn't handle the stress of being a mom. After my son was born I had debilitating panic attacks 3-4 times a week! They hit me out of the blue and it took hours to recover from the enormous crushing pain that I had in my chest during the attack. I'm convinced it has something to do with hormone changes after pregnancy. My doctor said I'll be on the meds for the rest of my life.
DeleteI caught your network debut, and I must say, "It was real, and it was spectacular." You realize that many of the commenters probably didn't watch the whole video, or even take a look at your blog. Some people just see the title and a few other comments and spout off. Because they're expert child-raisers and/or drug-takers. Que sera, sera. I prefer to alleviate the stresses of everyday life with a dose of scalding sarcasm.
ReplyDeleteYou are so much calmer than I am about it, but I think my expectations were far too high. You hit the nail on the head, though: it just didn't feel serious without a mention that the three of us have actual illnesses with actual names that require care and, in your case and mine, happen to be chronic, not due to a "road bump" related to motherhood. Becoming a mother is a HUGE event and transition and oh yeah, big life changes trigger many people prone to mood/anxiety mental health issues. I am glad that each of us was calm, collected and clearly engaged with our children on camera, even if the tone and framing was all wrong. I hope you get tons of traffic, because this blog deserves it. xo
ReplyDeleteI just saw a segment on the news regaurding this topic. I have had panic disorder and agoraphobia since I was 21 years old and I am now turning 30. I dont have children yet I did marry and divorce a man who had five children so I wss part time mommy. I have also been medicated for years unfortunately it is geneti and I will probably have to stsy medicated for life according to my doctor. Any woman or man for that matter who look down on medicating a medical condition needs the meds more then anyone and their insults are just a big pat on their backs. I would love to know how many of the people who are so opinionated are having a glass of wine or two with dinner. And if thats not self medicating then whst is it. So anyone who feels overwhelming pressure or depression dont let "pathetic" insults stop you from getting medical attention
ReplyDeleteI discovered your blog through Val and watched the TV segment with you and the other moms. My impression was that it was balanced and not overly critical of moms who want to stay healthy so they can raise their children. I also think it's brave of those moms, including you, to share your feelings so openly on TV. You are fortunate to have a husband who is so knowledgeable about the drug's side effects.
ReplyDeleteI thought you all did a great job. Anxiety conditions can be exacerbated by kids and I agree with pretty much everything you said here. I'm not sure why no one mentioned that moms who may have had moderate/tolerable anxiety may find their symptoms increasing once they have children. Ah well, at least they didn't imply everyone is getting their Rx from Bobby on the corner or, worse, from the Internet. So yeah. Well done!
ReplyDeleteAmen. I definitely was in the tolerable/manageable category before kids, and still am. I didn't need meds the entire time in the 12 years since I first took them. In fact, I was off and on antidepressants a lot. It's only been in the last 2-3 years that I've taken them consistently. I stopped taking them when I was pregnant and breastfeeding, which was about 13 months. I figured I was going to feel crazy because of the hormonal crap storm of pregnancy whether I took meds or not, so I may as well get off them and not expose the baby to any drugs.
DeleteI just chalk it up to tv. Have you watched many episodes of GMA? This is a show that had a talking walrus on day before yesterday, so I didn't expect any hard-hitting coverage on this. I mean no disrespect in saying that. It is what it is, and they're pretty good at doing what they do.
ReplyDeleteI'm thankful for the opportunity and I feel like the producer is good at what she does. This was on her desk for at least 4 weeks that I know of, and I also got the feeling that she might've put in some extra footwork to get it aired at all. If it had been aired a month ago, I believe it would've been given more time. Feminist moms who decide to stay home w/ their kids is this week's momma drama topic. Moms on meds is so three weeks ago.
By the way, the fact that the walrus could whistle was kind of impressive. I hate to admit I got a giggle out of that, but I did. The Whistling Walruses is going to be my band name when I magically wake up with musical talent.
I am glad you found the medication that made you feel better. Diagnosed as a manic depressive at age 40, I have been taking meds for 27 years whose side effects are much worse than their benefits. I haven't really tried antidepressants because AD are seen as destabilizing to bipolars.
ReplyDeleteThe hormones of 4 pregnancies and long term breastfeeding evened out my moods and gave me a very good 11 years.
I appreciate and admire your honesty. Far too long I have cowered in the bipolar closet.
I would suggest skepticism about having to be on meds for the rest of your life. I have been hanging around psychiatrists most of my adult life as an editor of psychiatry books, a social worker, and a bipolar patient. "The rest of your life" conventional wisdom is unproved. When I was editing famous psychiatrists in the late 60s and early 70s, there were hardly any drug ads in the journal of the American Psychiatric Association.
ReplyDeleteThe title of this blog is meant as hyperbole, and I've never had any diagnosis as anything other than your run of the mill depressed/anxious person, but I hate that there's a stigma with mental health stuff. It's as much a physical issue as any other medical problem. If the chemicals in your brain are out of whack a little, I don't see why that's different from having a thyroid issue or diabetes.
ReplyDeleteAnyway if you like mommy humor, stick around.